Monday, April 04, 2005
new & good
when i connect with the people in my life, i do my best to replace the usual "how's it going?" with "what's new & good in your life?" it immediately shifts the conversation from a focus on what's stressful, overwhelming and crappy, to what we are enjoying about our lives and what's going well.
and the answer to the question "what's new & good?" doesn't have to be some huge life changing thing...it could be that you saw a great movie, or that you are loving the sunshine today, or maybe that you are really pleased with a project you just finished. and sometimes it will be the big life changing things, like i'm graduating in a week, or my sister just had a baby, or i finished the first draft of my book!
the great thing about focusing on the new & good...is that not only does it take your attention away from the stressful and overwhelming, it actually can often transform it. i'm not advocating pretense, or not sharing all of yourself with your friends and family. but i think we do a pretty good job of noticing what isn't going well...and sometimes we need a little prompting to remember that a lot is going well.
just the act of saying outloud one or two things that are new & good, can make handling the stressful, overwhelming and crappy seem much more doable. you are not a complete wreck, your life is not headed straight for the toilet, and wow you actually did handle that project really well didn't you!
so try it out, ask your friends and have them ask you...what's new & good, recent & decent or even fresh & fabulous!
and new & good with me? well, last night i got together with my family and we played this board game oodles...and numerous times were all reduced to laughing so hard we couldn't breathe. it was great!